Bis leaves China
After Beijing and seeing some of the big cities on the east of China, I was pining for some rural exploration and hiking.
I've much preferred scooting down the west of China. Beijing, city of 15 million, tired me out (crowded, polluted). Nanjing, the old capital, also proved overwhelming. But the history of both places is fascinating - China's history dates back 4,000 years and involves six dynasties. In the city of Chengdu, somewhere in the West Midlands of China, I met up with some giant panda friends of mine. They were black, white and furry all over... just like I'd heard! The pandas didn't make eye contact, preferring instead to lounge around while noisily eating bamboo and shitting freely.
Highlights in China were the Great Wall in Beijing and the rugged mountainous countryside of Sichuan and Yunnan provinces in SW China. Less commerce and more traditions to observe. I really took to China, which is why i stayed for 9 weeks in all. The Chinese people are incredibly friendly once you get across the initial language barrier - a smile goes a long way as does the ability to use your hands to sign... lots of things. I have become adept at this - comical gestures with arms, fingers everywhere.
I wanted to get close to Tibet to get a taste of the Tibetan way of living. Would have been great to go across the border, but it's a dicy ride by bus - more than 2 days travelling on a bumpy and dangerous road to reach the capital, Lhasa. Also, Lhasa is at 3,700m so poss altitude problems. And my visa was running out. I stayed in an isolated town called Kangding at 2,600m - maybe 6hrs from the border. Most of the townsfolk in Kangding have ruddy cheeks and the Khambas (cowboys) look hard as nails, wearing leather and sporting ponytails and earrings. They come down from the villages to sell their wares. There was Tibetan dancing in the main square every day. Around 200 people, young and old, were shaking their booties in 2 circles when I was there.
Slight financial crisis though - I ran out of money (well i had about 10 yuan left, that's 32p). Most cities/towns have Bank of China's but not in this tinpot town. Tried to change traveller's cheques and use my card in the three local banks but with no luck. Fortunately, I hooked up with this Dutch guy and he lent me money to return to the city of Chengdu, 15hrs east. Otherwise I would have been shoe-shining or something to raise the necessary readies to continue travelling.
By this time, i was shorn of my rather itchy beard. Favourite spot in China was the so named Tiger Leaping Gorge 100km from the touristy town Lijiang, a fantastic two-day hike in the mountains. However, slight problem at the finish line of the walk when the Godfather of the local village mafia conspired to pull a scam by charging over the odds for the 3hr return bus trip back to Lijiang. Myself and 8 other westerners who had hiked the gorge were forced to wait about 5hrs while haggling negotiations were held with the village Boss. We were hostage to whatever they wanted to charge as there was only one bus back. All of ended up piling in a mini bus and paying 250 yuan (GBP17) in all. Small price to pay for each of us, but the Boss got a nice slice.
Meanwhile... on the Bisson Tour, I have indulged in a few fairly chaotic (read drunken, tuneless singing) karaoke sessions in the KTV joints-cum-massage parlours that seem to be everywhere in the Chinese towns and cities.
In Kangding, myself and this Schcwazy Dutch guy were out for a cheap beer and thought we'd get one at this karaoke bar-cum brothel. I ended up dancing some kind of waltz with a lady of the night at this joint, sashaying around in the KTV bar on the second level, the next floor being where you get down and dirty. (Bizarrely, there was a filmic backdrop showing Fatboy Slim's mega dance fest on Brighton beach).
Not wishing to go "upstairs", we made to leave. But the diminutive pimp with bad teeth and beige trousers had added a few expensive extras to the bill. There was a stand-off as we stood our ground and he and his 2 brothers suggested we should pay for our beers, mineral waters for the girls...and for dancing with them. He got a little agitated, becoming quite vocal. We couldn't understand a word of his cussing and held firm, eventually paying only 20 kwai (GBP1.30) and left. The Chinese don't like to lose face in any situation - it's a big thing over here. But I think he must have felt even shorter than his 5ft frame when we departed.
Had a couple of good nights out in another place called Lijiang at karaoke bars with some Americans and an English girl. Did lots of gambaying/down-in-ones after dinner. We did a rousing rendition of Hotel California by The Eagles and some other soft rock ballads, possibly even a Celine Dion number! I was in a mischievous mood, seizing the mic once the song was over and proceeding to compere some catwalk-like promenading involving the 5 of us who were out to the bafflement of the 20+ Chinese looking on. As I recall it went something like this: I introduced the participants in my best throaty commentator's voice and described what they were wearing/lack of dress sense as they walked to and fro. The beer had an effect - i was quite loud and very drunk! For my part, I minced down the imaginary catwalk and courtsied twice to the Chinese group assembled at one of the tables. I didn't give up the mic until i'd shouted a couple of loud "shie-shie's" (thankyous) and waved goodbye. Just like a true professional!
Cassandra, an American lass, put my reputation through the blender on the second night, forcing me and her chap to wear our t-shirts behind our heads, exposing our chests. This is how Chinese blokes dance in the clubs. Except they don't dance...they mince. And so we minced merrily!. Good times.
Next stop is Vietnam. Stop.
I've much preferred scooting down the west of China. Beijing, city of 15 million, tired me out (crowded, polluted). Nanjing, the old capital, also proved overwhelming. But the history of both places is fascinating - China's history dates back 4,000 years and involves six dynasties. In the city of Chengdu, somewhere in the West Midlands of China, I met up with some giant panda friends of mine. They were black, white and furry all over... just like I'd heard! The pandas didn't make eye contact, preferring instead to lounge around while noisily eating bamboo and shitting freely.
Highlights in China were the Great Wall in Beijing and the rugged mountainous countryside of Sichuan and Yunnan provinces in SW China. Less commerce and more traditions to observe. I really took to China, which is why i stayed for 9 weeks in all. The Chinese people are incredibly friendly once you get across the initial language barrier - a smile goes a long way as does the ability to use your hands to sign... lots of things. I have become adept at this - comical gestures with arms, fingers everywhere.
I wanted to get close to Tibet to get a taste of the Tibetan way of living. Would have been great to go across the border, but it's a dicy ride by bus - more than 2 days travelling on a bumpy and dangerous road to reach the capital, Lhasa. Also, Lhasa is at 3,700m so poss altitude problems. And my visa was running out. I stayed in an isolated town called Kangding at 2,600m - maybe 6hrs from the border. Most of the townsfolk in Kangding have ruddy cheeks and the Khambas (cowboys) look hard as nails, wearing leather and sporting ponytails and earrings. They come down from the villages to sell their wares. There was Tibetan dancing in the main square every day. Around 200 people, young and old, were shaking their booties in 2 circles when I was there.
Slight financial crisis though - I ran out of money (well i had about 10 yuan left, that's 32p). Most cities/towns have Bank of China's but not in this tinpot town. Tried to change traveller's cheques and use my card in the three local banks but with no luck. Fortunately, I hooked up with this Dutch guy and he lent me money to return to the city of Chengdu, 15hrs east. Otherwise I would have been shoe-shining or something to raise the necessary readies to continue travelling.
By this time, i was shorn of my rather itchy beard. Favourite spot in China was the so named Tiger Leaping Gorge 100km from the touristy town Lijiang, a fantastic two-day hike in the mountains. However, slight problem at the finish line of the walk when the Godfather of the local village mafia conspired to pull a scam by charging over the odds for the 3hr return bus trip back to Lijiang. Myself and 8 other westerners who had hiked the gorge were forced to wait about 5hrs while haggling negotiations were held with the village Boss. We were hostage to whatever they wanted to charge as there was only one bus back. All of ended up piling in a mini bus and paying 250 yuan (GBP17) in all. Small price to pay for each of us, but the Boss got a nice slice.
Meanwhile... on the Bisson Tour, I have indulged in a few fairly chaotic (read drunken, tuneless singing) karaoke sessions in the KTV joints-cum-massage parlours that seem to be everywhere in the Chinese towns and cities.
In Kangding, myself and this Schcwazy Dutch guy were out for a cheap beer and thought we'd get one at this karaoke bar-cum brothel. I ended up dancing some kind of waltz with a lady of the night at this joint, sashaying around in the KTV bar on the second level, the next floor being where you get down and dirty. (Bizarrely, there was a filmic backdrop showing Fatboy Slim's mega dance fest on Brighton beach).
Not wishing to go "upstairs", we made to leave. But the diminutive pimp with bad teeth and beige trousers had added a few expensive extras to the bill. There was a stand-off as we stood our ground and he and his 2 brothers suggested we should pay for our beers, mineral waters for the girls...and for dancing with them. He got a little agitated, becoming quite vocal. We couldn't understand a word of his cussing and held firm, eventually paying only 20 kwai (GBP1.30) and left. The Chinese don't like to lose face in any situation - it's a big thing over here. But I think he must have felt even shorter than his 5ft frame when we departed.
Had a couple of good nights out in another place called Lijiang at karaoke bars with some Americans and an English girl. Did lots of gambaying/down-in-ones after dinner. We did a rousing rendition of Hotel California by The Eagles and some other soft rock ballads, possibly even a Celine Dion number! I was in a mischievous mood, seizing the mic once the song was over and proceeding to compere some catwalk-like promenading involving the 5 of us who were out to the bafflement of the 20+ Chinese looking on. As I recall it went something like this: I introduced the participants in my best throaty commentator's voice and described what they were wearing/lack of dress sense as they walked to and fro. The beer had an effect - i was quite loud and very drunk! For my part, I minced down the imaginary catwalk and courtsied twice to the Chinese group assembled at one of the tables. I didn't give up the mic until i'd shouted a couple of loud "shie-shie's" (thankyous) and waved goodbye. Just like a true professional!
Cassandra, an American lass, put my reputation through the blender on the second night, forcing me and her chap to wear our t-shirts behind our heads, exposing our chests. This is how Chinese blokes dance in the clubs. Except they don't dance...they mince. And so we minced merrily!. Good times.
Next stop is Vietnam. Stop.
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